My life these days is hectic. I’m in a new job, with a crazy April 16 deadline that seems to be approaching at lightning speed. My training is increasing, and my time with friends is decreasing. I don’t know up from down most days, and the one thing I swore I’d never sacrifice for training (my morning time with God) is suffering. Wednesday, it all came to a crashing halt when my sweet girl, Barkley, found a hole in the fence line at the back of my yard. For 20 minutes, I searched frantically for her and with each passing minute became more and more hysterical. Of course, I found her happy as a lark trotting up the road with a smirk that seemed to say, “Hey mom! Look, I’m on an adventure!” I scooped her up in my arms and we headed home. I walked into my kitchen and fell to the floor sobbing.
All of the stress and the anxiety that had been building bubbled to the surface and released itself in the form of many, many tears. It was one of those ugly cries, yet absolutely cathartic cries. Both my parents called me and prayed over me as I collected myself to head into the office. I emailed my coach and let him know I needed a break. He is wonderful and gracious and said to take the time I need and that my response is normal.
So I’m taking a TV timeout. I’m not watching my diet or how much water I consume. I’m not squeezing in runs on lunch breaks or planning for early morning rides. I haven’t even wondered whether my Garmin is charged. I’m catching my breath, and I’m simply breathing. I am not quitting; I will still race in May. But I need a breather, a TV timeout.
Life comes first, and that means finding a new outlet to manage my stress and making sure my faith stays my priority. I love my new job, and I mostly enjoy training. But what I especially love, are quiet mornings with God and fun evenings with cheeseburgers and friends. I need a few of those, and then I’ll be back at it.
Oh, and I also need to patch a hole in my fence. 😉